Panama Hattys


Just before Christmas I got sick. Like hanging out in the bathroom for 4 hours, clinging to the side of the toilet bowl sick (sorry, TMI…). To be honest, I should have seen it coming – all of my colleagues had been off earlier in the week but I clearly have some ego issues when it comes to my immune system…

To be fair I got a pretty good deal out of it – within a few hours I was happily watching the Apprentice final with zero nausea (WHO KNEW shaving off a bit of facial hair could have such an effect?!). What I couldn’t bring myself to do was eat anything other than crackers, and whilst I pretty much ate my entire body weight in them it felt pretty restrictive.

When we went out for dinner the following day (at Panama Hatty’s, one of my all time faves – go check it out Cheshirites and Mancunians) I still wasn’t up to eating anything particularly exciting and ordered some simple rice and veg. Whilst the people I was eating with knew why I was eating such BORING food (can you tell I was bummed?!) it brought back all the feelings I used to have when I restricted: of being difficult, depriving myself of what I wanted, and getting jealous of everyone else’s meals.

And then guess what?! I had the overwhelming feeling of relief. That’s not me anymore! I don’t have to feel like that now! This is temporary! Holy moly that’s an awesome realisation :) We are not defined by our old habits, whether that’s overeating or undereating or, well, having a crush on Postman Pat.

Postman Pat

It doesn’t matter what we did 5 years ago, last year or this morning. What matters is what we do next.

And sure enough, a couple of days later I’m back to eating normally, from salads to all the cheese to cookies and cakes. Hallelujah!

What is your weirdest old habit?

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